Don't hate me

but I have a confession to make.


I hate summer.


I hate the heat. I hate the bugs (especially bees and wasps, to which I am allergic.) I hate the constant sunshine. I hate the pressure to be cheerful, to go outside and sweat, to have barbeques and wear swimsuits and eat fruit.

I just plain hate summer.

My birthday is in the summer. So when I was a kid, I never got to bring cupcakes to school and have everyone sing. I was always lumped in with the other "summer birthday" kids on the next-to-last or last day of school. My parties were always remarkable for the need to stay indoors lest we die of heatstroke, or the need to have that torturous amusement known as a pool party, during which you get water splashed in your face until your skin prunes and then have to eat food with your damp, chlorine-smelling fingers. Pool parties are especially fun when you're nearsighted and can't wear your glasses in the pool.

My skin turns bright red in the heat and humidity makes my hair frizz, so birthday photos of me generally resemble a sort of tomato with blonde fuzz around it.

People look at you funny if you wear long sleeves in the summer.

I get heatsick easily, too.

I like fall, when the air smells fresh and a little smoky and the sun goes away for a little bit...

Summer always feels like punishment. I don't even get to sleep late anymore like when I was a kid, because now I have kids who insist on rising at 7 am.

Bleh.

Is it October yet?